Is no news really good news???
So……………….
………………….waiting to hear back on two (bigger) items in my life.
A) whether or not I passed the Canadian Registered Nursing Exam aka the CRNE, which I wrote on October 6 of this year….results were mailed out Monday, so I will likely find out Monday 🙂
B) whether or not Sandy Lu, Literary Agent at the L. Perkins Lit Agency in NY, NY, is going to represent a certain project I have written.
I am patient, and resolve that time will tell, and that quite possibly both items will be relayed to me with positive outcomes.
Still the wait for both items is a little nerve wracking.
Both of them have great ability to influence the rest of my nursing career and my writing career.
Additionally, the anxiety about whether or not I have passed the CRNE has given me the occasional bout of indigestion and (admittedly) a few sleepless nights. What if I have to write it again? What will my boss think of me if I have failed my first attempt? How little of the CRNE did I actually know or not know? I’ve always done well on written exams….but this one, it’s a toughy. I really am really on the fence about how well I did.
Some days, I feel utterly confident and relatively carefree.
Other days, I feel as though there is an element of impending doom on the horizon, waiting to prove that I am a fool among the brilliant people I work with!
Oh woe is me, woe is me —- no news is NOT good news.
I am, for the most part, a patient sort of creature.
I do not throw tantrums when I can’t find the remote (probably because I habitually keep it in the same place), and I like to engage in little word games and create-a-story exercises when I am i.e. waiting in line in grocery stores.
Yet waiting for the outcome of this exam? ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE!!!
I kid you not!!!!
And as for waiting to hear back from Ms. Lu….I’m not too terribly perturbed about that, because while she is reading one of my projects, I have many on the go that I feel have great merit, and many that I have jotted notes for — and not even steeped myself in the process of writing these gems yet — because the timing has not been right to write.
No I have not lost my mind, I’ve found that there’s a bit of timing, focus, wavelength, mindframe/frame-of-mind and setting/surrounding/ambiance that is necessary to write certain tales………they will begin to inspire me more, and begin to actually even “write themselves” when the time is right.
And besides, Ms. Lu is a busy woman in a career where busy people like her may juggle hundreds of projects at a time. If my project hasn’t shone through the slush pile as something worthy of her greatest efforts, then i predict that I will be receiving a polite rejection letter in due time…..
If she likes it, but thinks it needs revising and resubmission, then that is what a semi-rejection-rejection letter will say.
Then there is the ULTIMATE prize for a writer seeking representation by an agent: the letter outlining the next steps to enter into contractual obligation for representation by the agent, or the SUPREME ULTIMATE prize — an actual contract for publication.
There are variations, of course. After careful consideration, she could always suggest that she doesn’t handle these kinds of projects, and refer me to a different agent.
Ah, so many different ways that i could receive news about the project.
Interestingly enough, that anxiety is FAR more pleasant than the whole CRNE self-torment.
*sigh*
Does anyone out there understand?
Then again, i really should count my blessings. Some people are waiting for news with life-or-death outcomes, i.e. the results of an HIV test, or to see how far the cancer has spread through their lymphatic system. Then there are paternity tests (who’s the baby daddy), and all kinds of other life-changing situations.
Perhaps I should not be such a cry baby.
Oh, but wait.
This is the Blog that is supposed to be addressing some of the gains and losses, trials and tribulations, frustrations and successes of the amateur author(ess).
There you have it folks.
A little bit on the literary agent waiting game.
Looking forward to hearing from her, whatever the outcome.
Happy reading!
Sincere regards,
Amanda M. Holt
Amateur Authoress, Possible RN-eligible GN, and Sometimes Crybaby
The Novels of Amanda M. Holt 